The power of silence to reflect inward for good mental health

Many people are afraid to be by themself in silence because of the pain they feel from their thoughts and emotions.
It is common to want to run from emotional pain, because it is so painful and distressing.
People run from their pain and internal conflict often by attempting to escape themselves through many means. Some of the most common are alcohol and drugs, but it can be constantly scrolling through social media, watching t.v, movies, binge watching series, constantly reading books and magazines and online articles, getting involved in intimate relations as a co-dependent measure for feeling secure with another, and on it goes.
Most people would have some awareness they do this to some degree, yet the only way to move past the pain is to address it by facing it.
It can be hard to know where to start when the mind is shooting thoughts and feelings all over the place but with a clear direction this can be worked on.
Running from emotional pain is the same as running from having a large wound that needs to be dressed so it stops bleeding, running from it will not heal it, it needs attention.
Taking time to reflect and ask quality questions of ourselves to understand why we feel as we do is paramount in mental wellness. It can be a challenge as we do have to face our pain in doing this, they key is to try and look at your thoughts and feelings with curiosity.
Asking questions such as:
“What emotion(s) am I experiencing exactly at the moment?”
“Why do I feel these emotions about this person/situation?” (what is triggering me?)
“Why did this event trigger me to feel as I currently do?”
“When was the first time I can remember ever feeling this way before? How old was I, where was I, what happened?”
This is just some basic examples of self questioning. The goal is to understand the triggers and find the root cause.
An example may be when someone becomes very angry if someone doesn’t always agree with them. Asking questions to why they get angry, what is the anger really expressing can help to shed some light on the deeper reasons. The anger is a symptom, and the trigger is the superficial cause, but there will be an initial cause that created this behavioral reaction to begin with.
For instance in this example, someone not agreeing with the person becoming angry could be the result of perceiving it as criticism. If it is criticism then the defence mechanism is anger so as to not experience the pain of being criticized. If this person that becomes angry thinks back over their life, their would have been a painful experience of criticism, perhaps from a parent for example, and that pain was so deep that in this fictional persons case it manifested into a defence so as to not experience the pain again, and that defence is the anger.
This does not mean anger for each person has the same reasons, this is a simple case example. A lot of peoples behaviour comes from deep subconscious beliefs about themselves and their lives and must be changed to improve areas of life that need improving for the benefit of the individual.
Deeper introspection would be to understand what the criticism means to the individual. Do they see it as not being of value, not important, not worthy etc. One event can create many false perceptions of ones self that need to be addressed to free the mind of limitations and unhealthy behaviours.
Working with myself, we can work together towards transforming your mind and therefore life.